nightlife, shoreditch

Rated & Retarded Shoreditch

I have to go out tonight, I don’t really want to but Kingmug wants to cwtch up with QueenMug on the sofa and understandably they don’t want me cramping their style with my singleton whinings. I’m not that bothered because in the immortal words of Charles from the movie Swingers, “this place is dead anyways”.

The upsides of this eviction are a) I’ve scoured the listings with the vigour of a Polish cleaner to deliverthis line-up to you fine people b) I will no doubt get epically BD, because I got it like that.

Rated

Vice Live Tour – 93 Feet East. The home of Vice Magazine , The Old Blue Last has been painted a horrendous black with gaudy gold trim – and we thought you people were supposed to have taste (well until we read your retarded views on this guy’s drawing)? Anyway…they have managed to get Ipso Facto (girl version of the Horrors), Black Kids (infectious, socialy-awkward looking american indie boppers) and Friendly Fires (we don’t like them) to play tonight for what appears to be an entrance fee of zero pounds. Get there early to avoid being locked out with the other jailbait-looking scene kiddies

Blues in the Boudoir, Barden’s Boudoir - lively line up headlined by The Guillotines. I think this may go off in a massive fashion, I’m torn whether to do this or the Vice night to be honest…Also note that Meet me in Saint Louis are playing on 6th Feb (we will be missing out on that to support our good friends, Grey Ties at Tommy Flynns in Camden).

Startrippers @ The Rhythm Factory (Saturday) – Hoxton Whores, Partyshank and some other folk are rocking up to tear it up at this late nighter just off the bottom of Brick Lane. Likely to be a party of A-Class proportions.

Retarded

Superbowl Parties. Thank god for organised sports, just think how dangerous America would be if most of the country wasn’t in a sport-induced coma?

Polysexual nights. We are liberal folk here at WSI but our experiences of polysexual nights have highlighted that polysexual basically means people who will fuck anything, including you, your dog, your mum, your sofa and other inanimate objects. There’s one of these nights going on at Passion in Dalston, go and try it and you can tell us how right we were tomorrow when all of your orifices have been violated!

1 Comment

• On 02.01.08 kingmug wrote these pithy words:

  Yeah, you’re the ho train conductor.

  Oh, wait, just coming into the FAILway station.

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